Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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