some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
