I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I have fence marks all over my body
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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