You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Randomize
