Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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