I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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