Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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