the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
