how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Randomize
