if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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