Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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