Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
You're a waste of cheezeits
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Randomize
