they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Randomize
