we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
