I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Panties = found
Randomize
