But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
