Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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