Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
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