Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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