i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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