It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
