$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Randomize
