But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
