I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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