Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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