thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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