end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
