yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
