Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
