are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Buhtt sex?
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Randomize
