I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Randomize
