my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Is Oprah even human
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
