Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Randomize
