the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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