Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(732): View more from New Jersey

You look like a girl that would like strip clubs

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(415): View more from California

She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.

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(970): View more from Colorado

I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off

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(802): View more from Vermont

you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.

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(+54): View more from

look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.

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(630): View more from Illinois

So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.

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(709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress

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