It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
