you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
