If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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