smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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