I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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