His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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