Who did Billy Mays play for?
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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