you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
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