you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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