It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
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