i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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