its not stalking. its research.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
i just made my gag reflex go away.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Randomize
