just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
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