Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
