My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Randomize
